I’m so tired
here at the end of this year
this year of mourning
denied and repressed
until I cried alone
and alone I undressed
I’m so tired
the end of this year of failed starts
classes that were endured
in a high healing smoke
friends and family that isolate me
in their righteous fist waving
look me in the face and call me those names
I guess the more we try to prove
the more we stay the same
becoming what we hate
and the hate just breeds more hate
and accuses the other of the same
and it just gets louder
until alone you cry
and alone you get dressed
and we can put on faces
and we can take up causes
but in that mirror of our anger
we still face the last laugh
in our sad but true nakedness
as we raise our righteous fists
and rot in our pride
and hang ourselves on our lies
I’m so tired
tired of these petty sins
that get shoved in our faces again and again
give me my pipe and my paper
and let me see my friends
take your arguments
for they will always be there
take your words that cut
because one day you’ll see the people in between the lines
take all the support only love could give
and then slap me with the time that remains
like some kind of retrograde
take all the support and use it like a soapbox
point your finger and preach
yes…because we become what we hate
and eventually hate what we become
and one day you will be alone
while you are coming undone
and I’m tired
at the end of the year of transitions
I didn’t even get to welcome the change
since all the anti shame warriors then felt the need to shame
so go get on your soap box and leave me be
hand me my pipe and free the weed
because in this circle the real life doers are still getting along
understanding life and love and peace
and we don’t put on faces
and we don’t take up causes
that mirror nothing but the oppressor
and we know who has the last laugh
on the last days of all of our age
when we mirror what we hated
when we face what we run from
when we undress
alone
